My 2nd Anniversary Wish for “Beyond the Gates”: Couplings, Uncouplings, and a Murder Mystery to Boot

Happy anniversary “Beyond the Gates”! Kudos to CBS for greenlighting a new soap and renewing it for a second year!

I am humbled that Marlena has asked me to comment on the couples of “BTG” in honor of this occasion. However, instead of my guessing where some of these duos are headed, I countered with letting me play fantasy head writer and project (admittedly cribbing a bit from my favorite soap, “Ryan’s Hope”) where I would like to see some of the show’s pairs go next. With that said, I want to preface that I am a big fan of the show. This is the first daytime soap opera I have watched religiously since ABC stupidly cancelled “One Life to Live” in 2012. I am rooting for “BTG” to succeed, but as with any show, there are things you love or dislike about it and wish you could change, all in fun.

You cannot do a column on” BTG” couples without first addressing its tentpole pair, the long-married Vernon and Anita Dupree. As the patriarch and matriarch of the clan, they are the glue that holds the family together. Yes, they can be preachy, sanctimonious, and hypocritical (constantly bashing ex-son-in-law Bill, an attorney and fixer, but then running to him for help to cover up whatever dirty deed has stumbled out of the Dupree closet), but they are basically good people whose love for each other shines through. They remind me of Maeve and Johnny Ryan of “Ryan’s Hope” who held strong while their family and friends surrounding them went off the rails. Also, I really like how frisky the couple is and that their age is not a deterrent for them to show their sexual attraction toward each other. I wouldn’t change anything about them.

I wish the writers, though, would do the same for Vernon and Anita’s congressman grandson Martin Richardson and his white journalist husband, Smitty. Here are very attractive gay men in their thirties and we rarely see a kiss. Also, we have never heard their backstories. What was Martin’s coming out like? Did the Duprees always accept him for being gay? With their family background, I find it hard to believe it was all kumbaya. Did he ever date women? And forget Smitty. His background and family are enigmas. Why they didn’t just make him nurse Ashley’s brother and Jan’s son, I do not know. The writers have turned Martin and Smitty into Mr. and Mrs. Beaver Cleaver, saddling them with two adoptive black teenagers. All Smitty is missing is a string of pearls around his neck and a pair of Manolo Blahnik pumps on his feet, as he vacuums the living room carpet. And while the other couples on the show jump in and out of the sack, we had only one sexy scene with these two. Hell, we have never even seen them shirtless around each other while hunks Tomas and Andre are always baring their chests with their partners. It is time to let Martin and Smitty have a second “coming out” and to spice up their relationship. Although they were pretty much AWOL on the New Year’s Eve episode, it was nice to see them out celebrating on the recent Valentine Day’s episode. Maybe it’s a start?

This leads me to the most mismatched couple, Jacob Hawthorne the cop and Naomi Hamilton the attorney. There is not a flicker of any chemistry between these two. Jacob gives off more heat with Smitty for goodness’ sake. First, when they were investigating the deep dark secret Martin was keeping and now with the undercover operation about a black-market plasma ring. Jacob comes alive in his scenes with Smitty. I know this will not be a popular opinion, but what about Jacob starting to realize he has “weird” yearnings for Smitty and starting to question his sexuality? It would be a whole lot more interesting than watching put-upon Jacob constantly trying to make his Debby Downer wife happy. And with Martin immersed in his re-election campaign, a neglected Smitty at first just tries to be a helpful friend to Jacob but then starts to feel more. As for Naomi, who just lies to Jacob or browbeats him to turn a blind eye when her family is suspected of committing a crime or caught in the act like pistol-packing Dani, she can just stick to helping her invisible clients at her invisible law practice.

As for some of the other couples, I despise distasteful, haughty Kat Richardson and am so hoping Tomas does her dirty. I wish Chelsea Hamilton would dump Madison and go back to being the fun party girl doing three-ways like she used to. She is too young and hot to become a boring married lesbian. I like Eva Thomas with hottie Izaiah Hawthorne, who seems to be a standup guy, and especially Dr. Ted Richardson with feisty head nurse Shanice. I hope the writers keep her strong to go toe-to-toe with wacko Leslie Thomas, who still delusionally lusts after her ex-lover Ted, and do not turn Shanice into a victim. I love me some Dr. Nicole Dupree Richardson, now newly divorced from Ted. She can do no wrong in my eyes and have sex with all the fine men in DC if she so chooses. I am all in.

Lastly, there is Dani Dupree Hamilton and Andre Richardson, and Bill and Hayley Hamilton. I love Andre and think he is the hottest guy on the show. But this is a soap opera, and good guys finish last. I want Dani and her ex-husband Bill to become this show’s Delia Reid Ryan and Roger Coleridge of “Ryan’s Hope” with their volatile, unbreakable attraction, always sabotaging each other’s new romances to get back together only to break up again. Dani needs to regress to her self-destructive ways and succumb to her feelings for Bill. She does to Andre what Bill did to her. Bill’s poisoning by Hayley (a storyline I hate and wish they just kept her as the suffering antagonist instead of turning her into a Black Widow) needs to come to an end soon. It has dragged on way too long. Dani can be the one who helps Bill figure out what Hayley is doing and saves his life. Once Hayley is whisked away in handcuffs to the Big Doll House, the affair between Bill and Dani goes into full swing with colorful lies like she is off on a modeling shoot but is really modeling new lingerie for Bill in a secret love nest.

Enter nurse Ashley (the dull white bestie of Naomi and disliked by most of the audience) who gets to go out with a shove. She stumbles upon the affair and threatens to tell her former love, Andre. There are confrontational scenes with Dani and Bill warning her to keep her mouth shut and from crazy, wild-eyed ex-fiancé Derek for her to stop seeing her new beau, Grayson. Then Ashley’s body is found at the bottom of the hospital’s staircase. There was a struggle and it looks like she was pushed. Shades of early Ryan’s Hope, and probably every soap that ever aired. Thus begins the “Who Killed Ashley Morgan?” murder mystery storyline. Dani, claiming her innocence, is arrested and her affair with Bill becomes public, shocking the almighty Duprees, as the trial begins. Stay tuned…